Tuesday, February 2, 2010

What Do You Wish He Knew?


Good news, girlfriends: It’s not January anymore. But the bad news? It’s February.

February in Wisconsin is generally not a big improvement over January in Wisconsin. This is true, apparently, across the country. I’ve been hearing about snow and ice and Mom to Mom “snow/ice days” in some of the most unlikely places.

There is, however, some good news about February. I’ve always preferred February to January. For one thing, it’s the month of Valentine’s Day. I really like Valentine’s Day. And it’s beautiful here today: light fairy-flake snow is falling gently in our yard and transforming the ordinary into something exquisitely beautiful.

Also—much bigger news—this year it is also the due-date-month for our fifth grandchild. He’s not due till February 16, but today marks the beginning of the two-weeks-before-due-date window, so who knows? I could be going to New Hampshire any day now to hang out with Soren and help Bjorn and Abby with their precious new little boy. Can’t wait!

Here’s some other news about February. Woody and I are preparing to teach a seminar at a big men’s conference this Saturday (“No Regrets” at Elmbrook Church here in Brookfield) on “Keeping the Romance Alive in Marriage.” Why is that good news? Two reasons: First, we have to practice what we’re getting ready to preach. :) And second, I love doing things like this together with Woody.

But, here’s where you come in—note the title of this blog. I need your help. Being one of the only women scheduled to be in the building with thousands of men, I want to represent all of us well. And I want to give these husbands some help in understanding what “keeping romance alive” in marriage looks like from the wife’s point of view.

So, here’s my question: What would you like your husband to know about your perspective in keeping romance alive in your marriage? What would you like him to say? Or do? Or not say or do? If this feels too personal, feel free to generalize: What would you like men to know about a woman’s perspective on what romance and passion look like in a marriage?

The conference is only a few days away, so rapid response would be appreciated. And even if you don’t get a chance to respond, I’m thinking this might be a good question for you to ponder anyway—and perhaps discuss with your husband. It could be good preparation for Valentine’s Day.

Speaking of which, Woody plans to do a little experiment with these men as an opener. First, he’s going to ask them: “How many of you know what tomorrow is?” (Note to any women who haven’t heard: Sunday, February 7, is Superbowl Sunday.) Guess how many hands will go up?! Then he plans to ask them: “How many of you know what one week from tomorrow is?” Now girls, you all know what that is.

I wonder what that show of hands will look like...

Stay tuned. And thanks ahead of time for any help you can give me.

2 Comments:

  • The little things are so important...a hug, an unexpected kiss, a backrub, help with the dishes, a night off from taking care of our child, a day off (ok, maybe that's not so little!), a night together without the TV or computer on, noticing a new shirt, changing the toilet paper, carrying in groceries, helping carry laundry, etc. My list might be too long, but you get the idea. Little things really add up and mean a lot to overworked, overtired wives/moms. It doesn't take a lot of money or a grand dinner out or a weekend getaway to keep the romance alive, although those are fine. What keeps it alive is all the little things added up to equal an appreciative husband. Being appreciated is huge!

    By Blogger kristi, At February 2, 2010 4:24 PM  

  • I would have to say, Kristi is right. In addition, I would say-- keep being our protector, our defender, our leader. Please do no leave me to make all the decisions. Please do not leave me to come up with all the ideas, romantic or practical. Please don't be insecure or self-conscious. Most women I know want to be married to a STRONG man. That doesn't mean one without emotions or needs, but it does mean a male who has a lot of backbone. The romance stays together if you feel like you are married to A Man, not that your husband has somehow become more of a son.

    By Blogger 3mily, At February 5, 2010 4:11 PM  

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